There’s so much catching up to do now, it’s going to take me a few days, but rest assured I’ll have all my Twitter, Facebook, websites and YouTubes all up-to-date in the coming days, weeks, months, or whatever.

So, what’s new? Well, I’ve completed Bioshock 2, which was the last thing I blogged about, a few times over. Sonic and Sega All-Stars Racing has been and gone too, which was a very fun game. Perfect Dark came out for Xbox Live, that’s an awesome game, and I’m currently playing through it along with Dante’s Inferno, which is another pretty awesome title.

Work-wise, well, its very busy. Mobilising to new areas, end of year reports, external audits, its been busy and this is primarilly the source of my missingness in the last few weeks. I’m glad to be having this Easter weekend off to actually get some time away from it all and do stuff like this, or chill out, or go for a beer.

Ah, there’s such a huge list of things to go through that I didn’t blog about at the time, its hard work right now. Maybe these things will just have to go unblogged. Never will we read about the exciting streets of broadway, Sonic 4, my various railway adventures to parts of the country, winning half a months wages in the bookies, a certain girl getting locked out of the office for a whole day, that chicken sandwich I ate, or Dawson missing WrestleMania because his phone was stolen. Perhaps some things are best left buried.

Nah. I’ll write about these things and more shortly. In the meantime, stay safe, be cool, and don’t forget, the rain falls up in Australia.

Oh yeah, the new Doctor Who that was on today is awesome. Matt Smith is a great Doctor. This brings that very old post about him I wrote ages ago full-circle or somesuch, the one where I buried him for no justifyable reason. Sorry Matt, all is forgiven.

A typical first bus maneuver. Thankfully, this wasn't my bus.

Driver change at Cheetham Hill Tesco, and the guy who took the wheel was, to say the bare minimum, a “rum cunt”. My primary reason for this judgement was the fact he walked like he had one leg bigger than the other and swore about 10 times in the 11 word conversation the two drivers had before driving off to continue the service. 

He managed to get as far as North Manchester General Hospital, which for anyone who knows the area isn’t very far at all, when we slid out of control down a tiny hill into one of those square white and yellow bollard and lampost. The windscreen shattered and the front of the bus sorta fell apart. 

Not ammused. Unfortunately, this would be the one day that I forget my phone, so I couldn’t take any TwitPics. You’ll just have to look at all the pictures of trams or me & Angela eating Subways instead. 

Oh, one thing I will say for Worst, their recovery truck arrived quicker than the Police did. Oh, and I wasn’t injured, before anyone asks, even the dodgy foot survived without any extra damage! 

Anyway, tumble dryer advice. Always buy Tumble Dryers in the afternoon when your feet have expanded. 

PS. Trying to get a new look and stuff on here, might even change the domain again as I suffer from major personality issues…….

After much soul searching, not bothering to shower for a week, sitting on the bus feeling miserable, doing some more soul searching, and eventually breaking down in tears, I decided, I just had to do it. I had to go to Subway. The pain of trying to stay away was just too strong, and now I’ve had my “super food”, I’m back on form, bitches!

So, what’s new, what’s improved, what’s the shizzle fo’ mo’ dizzle snizzle as Snoop Shizzle would dizzle? (White guys really should be banned from saying anything that ends in “izle”). Well, first of all, new website name, since the year is coming to an end and I’m going through site names at around one a year, so it all ties in nicely!

Also, brand new look to the site, improved the social networking links, including a new “TwitMe” button on all pages, plus a funky new Twitter feed, a revamp of the webcam, etc. etc. – plus lots of new videos, downloads, and some general tidy up and enhancement of the other shit.

Stay tuned, new Safety Spotlight coming soon too….. and it’s a corker. Might even be in video.

[rolf] Can you tell what it is yet? [/rolf]

I just thought I would plug my new blog. Not to be confused with this blog, mind, which is just fine and dandy as it is, this is a new blog. Woooo. 

http://ww… *ahem* http://www.gmtblog.com/ is a new blog dedicated entirely to the subject of Transport in Greater Manchester. GOSH HOW EXCITING you must be thinking. Well, yeah, but it’s a subject that I pay attention too, so, why the hell not?

 Updates will be several-weekly hopefully (because people are far more interested in how the buses are running than little old me, anyway) – and will contain tidbits on everything from how bad First are to several photo’s of GMPTE head Keith Whitmoore in a bannana hammock.

Anyway, that is all. Will write funny things soon. <3

You’re going to be so fucking proud. Honestly.

Today is the first birthday of the greatest blog since the 10 commandments, and to celebrate, the website has been given a complete and total overhaul. It’s really swish, fantastic, on the cutting edge. It’s even web2.0….

I could spend a good day or two listing all the new stuff you can play with on here, but it’d take me forever and you probably wouldn’t read it, so instead, I’ll just share my favourite bits.

The first, and most called out for feature is the ability to leave a comment! This is supplemented by the ability to share the blog posts with all your favourite social networking things, like MyFace, Spacebook, Twater and Peabo. I guess the most exciting part of all, though, is the fact that this website now has a backend, meaning it can shit properly. It also means I can change and add to it from a web browser (read: from work) without much effort. This’ll mean much more frequent blog posts, updates etc.

And if that wasn’t enough for you….. this new site is actually finished! Yes, finished. Fitted and furnished. Complete. Wonderbar.  The contact page works, the videos have been rejigged, the whole thing now works in harmony and, most important, the safety spotlight has made a glorious return along with all the other things I was supposed to re-upload one year ago.

I knew you’d be proud. I propose a toast.  Here’s to another….year!

Can you Adam n’ Eve it? YouTube finally whacked the ban stick down on my old account full of things that should not have been there, so the video section is now also useless, along with the content bit, the contact bit, and pretty much all of it. The development time on this website is becoming beyond funny, I know, but at least the blog is kept semi-updated.

The problem is, my other channel, with the HD videos on, has also now gone, as I stupidly used the same e-mail address. Aren’t I clever?

I recently did a talk to an entire school about the virtues of Health & Safety. That’s 650 kids. (Nobody else would do it, no.) Suffice to say the experience was, well, different than I was expecting. Kids have a good sense of humor, and teachers are a lot hotter than I remember. Teaching assistants are anyway. The where totally all over me and my shining high-vis and safety helmet. (….or not).It was surprisingly good fun anyway. We had a DVD projector set up and banners and stuff, it looked really professional. I think the best bit was when I asked the kids what a skip was, and one girl replied back “crisps”. – Good times.

Anyway, I totally also went to York last weekend to see Tornado, the brand-new steam locomotive, the first one built for over 40 years, and also Sir Nigel Gresley, the A4 Pacific loco. 4am rise, out of Piccadilly Station by 5am – suffice to say it was a good day, although the hangover was a little too much for some, and indeed York station now has a sort of barf-yellow tint. You can check out the photos at the usual place.

Anyway, gotta scoot’n me noot’n, or however that saying goes. I shall wite about the dying or potentially by that time dead Jade Goody soon, along with fixing the 500,000 errors and shiz.

Peace bredren.

I’ve recently changed mobile networks from T-Mobile to 3 (or three, 3G or H3G depending on how fickle you are) – and I’m more than impressed to say the least and very happy I made the move.

I’m not able to be online as much anymore as I say, however my HTC TyTN in theory allows me to stick on Messenger wherever I go and also lets me do work, check my mail and browse the web on the move. In theory anyway. T-Mobile have been doing their very best to scupper those efforts by blocking every port apart from 80 and 8080 it seems.

3 on the other hand are different, They not only allow me to use Messenger on the move but they make it free, along with Skype, so I can keep in touch with people for free wherever they happen to be, which is neat indeed.

HSPDA internet access is just £5 a month fair use, far better than £2.50 for five days under T-Mobile – with all the blocking – and no HSPDA access for PAYG customers either. I’m now surfing unrestricted, faster, for less money.

So to those who knock 3, I reccomend that you dump T-Mobile if you have them, and move to 3. I’ve never been happier, plus they gave me £10 for taking my number with me. Their coverage actually is better than T-Mobile – I actually get a good signal in my office and not only that – HSPDA coverage – and it’s in Crumpsall, in the sticks.

Infact I was so happy with 3 I actually felt like doing things with my phone again. I’ve tuned it up with the neatest gadgets (screenshots below) – and infact the staying online worked so well my phone was vibrating across the desk all night with new IM’s, e-mails etc. that I had to turn it off – it’s never been off for as long as I’ve had it – I might have to start putting it in silent. xD

Clicky those for larger / more screenies, if you want to explore my phone out of morbid curiosity. It now features a clock and messages overview / Messenger / the weather / my programs including a rather neat National Rail and GMPTE live information things, and also this site on my mobile through HSPDA.

Anyway from one boring subject to another, here is the video from the East Lancashire Railway’s end of steam on British Railways 40 year anniversary. This is special for three reasons:

First it’s the last time the glorious and wonderful 9F 92214 will be at the ELR before it moves to pastures new. Seccond it is the first time in over 100 years that the steam engine at the start of the video has ever run in public service – and last but not least I also take a ride in two Mk1 coaches from the origonal 15 Guinea Special – the last ever steam train to run on British Rail – until now at least.

So enjoy that and whatnot and I promise to write up soon with interesting stuff and other things fun.

Loveyalotsandallthatxxx

Lots of ground to cover really. I really have found it hard to keep my website updated, or to even be online in general, and to be honest I’m so backlogged at this point that it isn’t even funny.

My YouTube account is buried in 200 “lolz u know Jeff Hardy??” messages from 15 year old girls so I’ve written that off, as I have my MySpace (…yeah, I do have one of those, even though I’ll deny it unless it happens to be irrefutable) – but that never cought on anyway.

I have however made the time today to write about a whole bunch of stuff that I’ve been observing during my travels and adventures in the world, noting them down in the hopes one day I’d actually bother to log-on and write up about it.

Starting off on the subject of kids, or more specifically kids in public.

The problem with me and kids is I have no paitence for anything I don’t care about, and other people’s kids fall neatly into that catagory. Last month in Subway I was enjoying my weekly BMT when in wandered a typical British family, two daughters around 4 and 6.

Now when you introduce barriers that segment the queue into the equasion it’s a recipie for disaster. Maypolling around them and doing laps of the entire restraunt while screaming, giggling and singing is, to say the least, annoying during while you’re trying to eat your tea.

The tempation to just stick my foot out and cause utter pandamonium was almost too great. Had it not been situated so close to a police station I would almost certainly had done it.

Even worse was a couple of weeks ago when some Jewish family got on board the bus, and the 5 year old kid decided (typically) to sit behind me, and then constantly kick the seat in front of him (mine, for those following) – again my paitence was wearing thin. If I wasn’t in a high-vis and company colours I would have completely gone balistic. (Damn professonalism….)

Speaking of the Jewish…

No doubt this is going to draw tons of un-nessasary heat from ethnic minorities here, but, I have to ask Orthadox Jews here in Britain, why don’t you modify your religon so that the black top-hat does not need to be worn in the rain?

Seeing people wear a hat then a plastic see-through hat on top of the hat (which I am told is on top of a skull cap) seems rather excessive. I’m sure God or whomever is dictating the hat rule will make exception for a British summer shower? You see some funny things on the bus…

…Including signs of the end of the car?

I really am starting to wonder if the car’s days are numbered. Seriously. Some rather spectacular shifts in public attitude are starting to become apparent in society.

One recent example is the fact that many petrol stations are so desperate to stop people only filling up half way that petrol actually dropped by several pence overnight for the first time since petrol was invented. People are now starting to be smart with their fuel and only fill up for the journey, and not the whole tank.

This is just the start of it though. I am rather beside myself to report that rail passengers in Britain have never been higher. Ever. Numbers are so high, that the system is starting to grow faster than ever before, so much so a massive overhaul of public transport is to take place – funded by congestion charging.

Good ol’ First are now on this bandwagon too, making a noticeable and very public campaign – which not only involves specially painted signs on the sides of buses but also billboards and even TV and radio advertisements, proclaiming that it costs £40 a week to run your car compared to £14 a week to travel unlimited on a weekly ticket.

Think about it. I don’t drive, and I have no intention of ever doing so. I’ve yet to find a place that I can’t reach by public transport and the good old fassioned pair of legs and doubt I ever will, unless it happens to be somewhere so daft even a car couldn’t get there.

I don’t see 2/3rds of my wages vanish every month, simply because I don’t pay road tax, insurance, maintainence, petrol, payments on a car, or any kind of travel cost whatsoever except £14. And for that I get any place I want to go.

More and more people seem to be clued into the fact cars are over-rated too, despite public transport’s failings.

Something that didn’t fail however was The Forbidden Kingdom.

I saw The Forbidden Kingdom at the cinemovies, starring Jackie Chan and Jet Li, and I will simply say that this film is by far the best thing I’ve been to see in a long time.

The story is of a young American lad with a Kung-fu fetish, who visits his China Town DVD store (run bizzarely by a facsimilie of Wise Old Man from my favourite anime-based franchise Goeman, no hentai mags to be found sadly.).

Then some of those “cool” street kids (with the retarded accents) and brains smaller than a pea show up and try to rob the old man. The DVD fetish guy springs into action and takes this Staff that is on a mantle peice, and then is chased up a building, and so far this sounds shite I know.

Frankly I’d read a proper synopsys because mine sucks. The upshot is he goes back in time to ancient China to return this Staff to the Monkey Prince who has been turned into solid stone by the Jade Warlord.

The plot is almost, but not quite as spaced out as the sort of offering you’d expect from Japan, complete with crazy hot female bad girl who floats and has an outragous hair style. Most of the characters have elaborate costumes and outfits and many of the characters fly and live on a giant mountain where the laws of physics don’t apply, so this is heading firmly into anime terratory I think.

Despite this it has lots of cool Oriental music, fantastic fight scenes which are simply unbelieveable, especially with Chan and Li, and most importantly the comedy is provided by the shovel-full.

Despite reading this retarded review I reccomend you see it right away and believe me when I give it the five stars. *****

Panoramics…what the smeg are they, you ask?

Well you see, my phone does have this random function that lets you stich together 180′ panoramic pictures. I decided that I would make some of my travels less boring by using this feature. The results are bad. Here they are though for your enjoyment:

Yes, that bad.

OMGWITH FINALLY CAUGHT ONE THE BASTARDS….

Failing completely at catching things inherently Canadian – Sheep might say – is my life story (…drawing more heat, yah…), however I actually managed it some weekends ago.

Yes Gents, the Class 66, or “Shed”, is now offically on camera and captured by yours truely. That would be a locomotive for those who are confused at this point.

And not only did we get a double-header (two together, rhyme) – we got a two-tone down courtesy of horn-boy for the day Thomas (not the tank, my brother….)

Gee, the enthusiasts among you are now thinking, “how queer, I see them nearly every day”. Fact is so do I, but never, EVER, EVVERR do they ever want to be around when I have my camera out. Seccond it goes in my bag, or I just step onto a platform, they’ll roll by, but never ever while it’s out. >_>

Anyway the glorious moment is available here at time index 1:29. Watch the entire thing if you feel like vomiting.

Bus Etiquette (or to put it another way, smelling of piss on the bus.)

Right, this is basically a message to all old people, five amps, alcoholics and drug addics in the Greater Manchester area. IT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE TO GET ONTO THE BUS SMELLING OF YOUR OWN URINE.

Now of course, you’re thinking, this is not something that happens often, surely? Fact is it happened today, and twice last week, and far too often, and it really does ruin everyone’s day.

The main culprits are the poor old people who can ride for free on public transport but, ultimately, not take a free shower. The fact is you should be showered and clean before you even consider stepping foot on a bus, and any attempt to do otherwise is just plane out of order.

Seriously people, sort it the fuck out, it’s becoming really a pet hate. I might start issueing video-recorded happy slapping for YouTube publication should I catch anyone else smelling of excessive BO, piss, shit or other bodily fluid on the bus.

And finally, TheAwesomeOne goes into print…

You’re probably really intregued reading this right now wondering what magazine I’m going to be in. Vogue? Red Hot? Playboy? Radio Times? Railspotters?

The Morrison Plc company magazine is the answer! Yes folks, I was asked to pose alongside a female collegue in order to put some publicity shots into and onto the cover of an internal magazine with a print run of about 20,000 to be distributed across Great Britain and Nothern Ireland to all Morrison and Manchester Working bases.

It really is that retarded. The magazine goes into print in September so when I get a copy I’ll share it (if it turns out alright) but until then you can just savour the dissapointment.

Anyway that’s far too much ranting and raving, as always hit me up if you get the time or otherwise just tow the line and put $5 on the fact the next site you visit will be Google